Dear Winter Olympics,
How DO your NBC correspondents manage to find the most heart-wrenching stories of athletes who've overcome & endured to excel in their sports? Nooo...it's not just a Double McTwist 1260...nooooo. It's a Double McTwist 1260 done by someone who was BORN WITH A HEART CONDITION. Riiiight, of course.
I am writing to see if you could please give me my life back. My way-too-late nights are spent rewinding & re-watching the best crashes, wins, and ceremonies...all while drowning in a sea of snotty tissues. Our mornings? The kids watch the highlight reel while eating their cereal...and they're NOT ALLOWED TO EAT IN THE LIVING ROOM!!!
I need sleep. We need to be on time to catch the school bus. We need our couch cleaned.
Hey, guys...maybe just a week instead of two next time?
Sincerely,
The Farris Family
P.S.-- You have to be CRAZY to do that skeleton thing. And ice dancing is boring.
1 comment:
Skeleton--luge for people who want to freaking SEE WHERE THEY'RE GOING!!! Ice dancing--opportunity for athletic men to wear spandex without learning to play synthesizer and joining an 80's reunion band. Biathlon--how they sneak assassins into Vancouver. My personal fave?? Got to be short track speedskating. Roller Derrby with a pair of fifteen inch blades. Too awesome. --Scott
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